Today I found out that the girl who was murdered from the Craigslist thing was someone I personally know. I never had her as a student and she graduated the year before I taught at Park, but I have sat in many a judges' lounge with her discussing the world, her experiences, politics and future plans.

She was truly a dancing spirit. She vibrantly entered people's lives and left a footprint no one can forget... even after meeting her just once. Her short, curly red hair would bounce as she told of her experiences in Turkey and how she's trying to decide between programs and what do you think? Her blue eyes would flare with abstract processing as she took your words, a perfect stranger's words, to heart.

Someone killed her.

She was answering an ad to be a nanny. But it wasn't a nanny ad at all. It was a nineteen year old boy. And he killed her.

I can't get past this.
I see myself going through the stages.

Right now I'm just angry. And I want to blame it on anyone.
And I'm hurt.
And I'm scared.

She wanted to change the world. She was changing the world. And now the world is a sadder place without her. Truly.

Every once in a while my eyes will wander to the wall of senior pictures that I have and my mind begins to wonder about them... hoping, maternally, for safety. At least safety.

At least safety.

I remember that one of the last conversations we ever had was about one of her speechers. The girl was doing an informative piece on eyes: bringing in a lot of the sayings about the eyes being the window to the soul and what about eyes make people beautiful and how eyes read things and even to the scientific of how eyes work. Blue eyes versus brown eyes, eye placement, everything. She was so excited because it was going well and, truly, she was passionate about the topic.

I wonder what she saw through this nineteen-year-old boy's eyes and into his soul.

It makes me shudder to think.